Count

Months ago, I received a phone call from my cousins Mariel and IC asking if I do have any interest in registering myself for the upcoming SK elections. This call made me realize I am at the right age already to exercise my right to vote as the so-called "kabataan" and a part of the "sangguniang kabataan." Ang tanda ko na pala! haha. Parang kailan lang, I was begging to my mom if I could accompany her vote for a President way back when it was FVR running as president. Anyway, nakaka-overwhelm na magkakaroon ako ng bilang sa lipunan. I was asked several times and given a number of chances to register for the elections. My cousins and my tita were convincing me to register but their business talk didn't work to me that much. After those missed opportunities, I came to a halt and made my decision not to register for the SK elections. Mariel and IC kept asking me why, I said I just don't feel like it. My tita asked me it's my lost because I might not get admitted to PLM (Pamantasan ng Lungsod ng Maynila) or UP if I don't count myself in for the elections. Still, I stood on my decision. Hindi naman sa tinatamad ako magparegister at magpakapagod just to vote, neither did the media influenced me by telling that people were crammed at the COMELEC Office. I just don't think nobody deserves my vote. Why? To tell you frankly, some of the candidates are family friends, relatives, and families, and I decided not to vote for anyone of them. Knowing their goings-on made me realize they don't deserve the recognition and etc. and somebody else deserves it. Somebody who is responsible enough to be a role model, and not just another stupid boy who had had his girlfriend pregnant at sasabihing hindi siya ang father. Somebody who is consistent in everything he/she does, not just boasting stupid achievements. Somebody who is sensitive of what others might feel, not being sensitive on what others might think of the clothes he/she wears. I am not being prejudice to any of the candidates and I don't have anything against them. I just think somebody else deserves the office.
Realization came to me; I feel sorry because I am blinded by the things my mind dictates me, but still I believe-somehow- some of them have the guts of what it takes to be of service to the youth. As what Kuya Daryl said, Everybody deserve chances, not a second chance. God gave us several chances, why can't people give chances as well?
Before, I was asked to run as an SK officer, but I decided not to run because I promised to myself not to enter "crappy politics", in any form. Buti na lang di ko naisipang ilagay sa kahit anumang application form ko for college ang public administration! hayyyy...

I PROMISE, my blog as my witness, NO TO RUN IN ANY POSITION IN THE GOVERNMENT. haha. as if. ( :

The inconvenient truth

I went to Philippine General Hospital just this afternoon to visit my aunt for she was hemorrhaging. She was confined in the psychiatric ward because she's a bipolar. I was hesitant to enter the ward because I was afraid of those people who are not so mentally healthy. My knees were trembling as I was walking the hall to my aunt's bed. My other titas warned me about these patients who were just roaming around the room and you cannot really distinguish who they are because they are not wearing gowns, not even hospital tags. So, I went on with walking and finally saw the scenario myself. First impression-still scared. I was able to meet this girl- whom I learned from my tita-who keeps asking for everything she sees. Like, when my ate brought food for my aunt, she asked her to give her the food. And I saw this thirteen-year-old girl who is suffering from schizophrenia. She approached my aunt's bed and slowly wrapped her arms around my aunt's and told her to take care. She calls my aunt "lola." She thought my aunt will be able to go back home. My aunt told her to get well soon and get back to studying. By the way, the girl had mental problems because of studying too hard. I was astounded upon knowing her story. After hearing those from my aunt, my ate told me not to be hard on studying or I might get crazy. I was expecting for gloomy and insane patients, but they seem to behave well as if they are not suffering from any psychotic disorders at all. After asking my aunt how she is I finally decided to go out to let the others visit her since they are only allowing one person per patient. I slipped out toward the door and another patient, a woman wearing a green-striped shirt, was wailing about the nurse who shooed her away from the door. She was saying things loudly like Susan Roces is her lola and she has a very good-looking husband. It was scary because she looks very angry and irritated. She is at the nurse's desk near the door and I was scared she might do something to me. So, I tried to calm down and passed the door with all the horror kept inside me.

I feel sorry for the patients and I think they don't deserve such discrimination. I feel so sorry for being so insensitive and how I wish I could help them. I felt very sorry especially for the thirteen-year-old girl. For such a young age she's suffering from a very serious sickness. She's very gently and loving, I don't think she deserves being there. Going to such place is an eye-opener to me. They deserve more than insults and laughs. That made me think of Psychiatry as an option for college.

Moving On...

It has been a week since the last time I have updated this blog. I am a year older once again, mourned for another lost of a family member and stormed by another row of stressful and über-nerve wrecking school activities. Oh, and have I mentioned C.A.T.?! HATE IT!(take note of the caps)

So what's with the title? I'm pretty sure the phrase "moving on" rings the bell. Ok, let me drag this entry to what I should take account of to make this oh-I'm-so-sleepy blogpost relevant to its title. As I was saying, We've lost another family member, and this time it was my lolo. What pains me the most is seeing my lola very sad, for she is very accustomed to the presence of her husband; he was the one who takes care of her even though he's having a hard time, too. Because of this very tragic event, we have to make certain decisions not only for the sake of my lola, but for the sake of the whole family as well. Father was the only one who made it to Davao since we do have our classes and mom had important business with her work. He went there, met some old friends, colleagues and family members whom he lost contact with after residing at Manila for merely three decades. Together with his friends, they decided to plan and work for certain matters, and somebody has to work on the arrangements my lolo had been working on during his last days, and they needed somebody who can accompany my lola since she's old and she's sick, and loneliness might aggravate her illness. Because of these reasons, father was obliged to move to Davao, but he can not do things all by himself, so the family decided that the boys (pops, kuya and Francis) will move to Davao and mother, me and ate will remain. Since my ate resides at Las Pinas, and it's just me and mom left, we decided to leave the house we rented for three years and just move to Las Pinas (mom doesn't want us to rent a house with just the two of us( she says it's very odd-but I don't think that's the real reason behind it). For now, we are "geographically separated" but still we are very united and we soooo love each other specially in times like this. But I know this decision will lead us to good, for we are very confident that God is on our side. The important thing is this: To be able at any moment to sacrifice what we are for what we could become. Sometimes, we have to take risks for us to grow and for us to see the beauty behind the ugly.

So much for drama, see yah all soon!

By the way, we might follow them next year and settle there for good. Mindanao blogger na rin kaya ako in the near future? We'll see.

Not a girl, not yet a woman

It's my birthday today and I'm a year older again! haha. I turned seventeen and it's just a year left before being called as "grown up". How cool is that, eh? I hate getting old! So what are the challenges and things at stake of becoming a seventeen-year-old girl? or woman? nah, whatever.
First, college. I'll be heading to college next academic year!
Second, the more mature and more lady-like me. But they cannot kill the kid in me. haha.
Third, independence. But that doesn't mean being rebellious or anything.
Fourth, responsibilities. Getting old means getting more responsibilities, and in my case, it is my responsibility to look after my lola now that she's alone.
and lastly, this traveler-wannabe will be on a row of more great and fun adventures! Let's see if I can act like a real adult.

Anyway, so how did my birthday went? Me and my cousins, IC, Mara, and Camille went out and we ate, ate, and ate. Oh and we played, too. It was fun and cool because it is the first time we went out with just the four of us without any titas and mothers around. We tried on clothes, roamed in and out of shops, and laughed our hearts out. I will never forget this day.

I want to thank thess people who greeted me :

Angie, Shelah, Chery, Tin, Hanna, Phyllis, Jillian, Nica, Mariel, Kuya Drian, Kuya Daryl, Ate Anna, Ate Trins, Tita Mar, Tita Imay, Tito Rey, Ate Honey, Redlan, Joey!, Camz, TEONs!, Staffers, Allen, Roy, Ms. Galang, Chary, Ms. Remigia Dipasupil (yeah boy!), Sir Barcelon, Clarence, Alex, Jordan

a card from ate, Camille and Joey

A greeting from Kuya Daryl through friendster.

and a whole lot more. Thanks everyone, and may we all have a wonderful year. I want to thank God for giving me such a wonderful year, and for giving me another year to live and to look forward to. I also want to thank Him for giving me wonderful friends who were always there, family who keeps me sane and for giving me a wonderful lolo who served as and will always be my inspiration. So sad he had to go. I miss him.

Cheers!

Finally

After being out for some days, I'm finally back! So what made me soooo burnt out this week? First stop, I was sick for a few days, then I lost my lolo, and it was sad. And now that it is just two days from now 'til my birthday, I am missing him more. He never forgot our birthdays and never forgot sending us presents. Secondly, I was soooo busy with school stuffs, edit videos, prepare projects and the likes. I hate seniority's most-crucial-year-in-high-school, one mistake leads to another.

* * *

I got my report card, and as usual, I got Filipino as my lowest grade. It is not a surprise to me anymore, but I'm looking forward to much better grades next quarter.

* * *

Congratulations to kuya Ayel for winning the Misteryosa award for pinoyblogosphere.com's Wika2007 contest "maraming Wika, Maraming Bansa" blog writing contest. His entry truly deserves the recognition and the prize. :)

* * *

At a difficult time, our heartfelt thanks for your condolences. Thanks to kuya Daryl and the Doll House Kin, and everyone in Raymond and The Light staffers. Thanks a million, guys. Let us continue to pray for the eternal repose of the soul of my grandpa, Mardonio Ferrer.

Thanks for the Memories

Never Alone

I feel you in the morning
When at first I awake
Your thought is with me
With each decision I make

You'd been around forever
Since the first breath I took
Now I have to go on alone
But for love, I need not look

Cause by what you bestowed
In our short time together
Will last in my heart
Forever and ever

Although you've left
And now walk above
I'm never alone
I'm wrapped in your love

Enjoy now your long waited reward
Feel peace that your love continues on
What was taught to me, will be taught to mine
Cause you live on in me even after you've gone

I was ecstatic to start this day for I thought it would mean rest-physically, mentally and emotionally. I didn't have enough sleep the day before yesterday for I've been busy lately on some school stuffs. Early this morning, while I was wondering what would happen at school, a phone call shocked us all- it was from my tito from Davao. I knew that call meant bad news, for my lolo was rushed to the hospital again, and was under observation in the ICU. I was hoping for a word not worse as death, but the expression I saw on my father's face, I knew that was it. I went to school with the question if my speculation was right, and just made myself believe that it was not the one I was expecting my father to tell. I acted as if nothing happened until I was homed from school. My younger brother broke the word to me, and asked if I knew anything about it. I said I knew all about it, though I was really hoping it was not true; I was denying the truth, and I am really worried for my father for he love my lolo so much. I knew the news would aggravate the worries and fears, especially my lola, who is in a delicate condition because of diabetes,and for she does not have any idea about what had happened. I am worried how will my grandma take it, and how will the family break the word to her.

My lolo is a great man. He had served the country as a military officer before his retirement. He helped in the peace and order of Mindanao, and asked the government shelter for those military retirees, granting many dreams. Though our family seldom see him personally-for we reside in Manila, and them, in Davao- he had never forgotten our birthdays and he thoughtfully sent us presents. When I was a child, I often send him letters, and knew he was proud of me when I first went to Davao. He kept the letters and gifts I sent him for Christmas, which happened to be his birthday, too. My father often tells us stories about how he had raised them, and how he had sent them to good schools despite of being an average family, and the likes. It was pity we were not able to spend more time together. I feel guilty again, for I have not told him verbally how much I love and respect him, for he is my idol. I am thankful God gave me a loving and kind lolo.

Thanks for those who showed great concern and expressed their sympathy.
Please pray for the eternal repose of the soul of my lolo.

The painstaking NCAE

After a few days of preparing for the National Career Aptitude Examination, it was a great relief for me to answer the last question of the test. The actual test-though it has more items- is much easier than the mock test. But when it comes to the Manipulative Skills part, I have to be really careful with my answers for the choices seem to be the same, which makes it confusing.

There are some typographical errors in the test kit; there are punctuations and informations missing. But overall, the test went fine. Well, the aim of the test is just to guide the students what career should they pursue depending on what area they excel best to determine the field they are most likely to succeed; meaning to say nobody will fail. I am satisfied with the test and very happy for getting two new Mongol#2 pencils ( not for free of course, but we paid for it cheap.) haha. But the aftermath of the exams is an unnerving headache which until now I am suffering from. I think a good night sleep would suffice.

(It is actually Arnold's paper, I wrote there the formulas I needed, and I am pretty sure you won't be able to distinguish who had written which, and there's my two new Mongol#2 pencils!)

Indeed, appreciating simple things is the simplest way to find happiness. ( :

Thanks for those who prayed and who wished me good luck.

* * *

After a long wait, I finally watched Da Vinci Code on HBO. I was not able to see it on screen since I am not at the age yet. (haha, wait for me til next year!) I tried reading the book but it didn't caught my interest. But as I have seen the movie, I think the story is not persuasive enough for me to be troubled with my faith. Pictures and symbols are not enough evidences. Besides, even if Da Vinci intentionally hid codes in his works, basis is still a big question. But I must say, those who believes on what he sees might have doubts with his faith.

* * *

The voting is reopened for Pinoy Blogsphere's Wika2007 blog writing contest until August 31, 2007 for there were some contestants who have not voted yet. Vote for your favored entries here: http://pintig.pinoyblogosphere.net/
Results of the contest will be announced on September 5, 2007.

Superiority complex and trust

The seniors attended today's mass to ask the Lord for guidance for the upcoming National Career Assessment Examination. The gospel was (John 1:45-51), Nathanael is introduced as a friend of Philip. He is described as initially being skeptical about the Messiah coming from Nazareth, saying: "Can anything good come out of Nazareth?", but nonetheless, follows Philip's invitation. Jesus immediately characterizes him as "an Israelite indeed, in whom is no deceit". Some scholars hold that Jesus' quote "Before Philip called you, when you were under the fig tree, I saw you", Nathanael recognizes Jesus as "the Son of God" and "the King of Israel".
I was deeply moved by the homily given by the priest, and he mentioned "superiority complex" and "trust". I wanted to run because of shame, for I knew I was one of those persons being "bossy" at times. This made me recall some things at school, my problems with my group mates, reprimanding them to bring this, bring that, do these things etc. I realized I was being hard on them. Handling a group isn't as easy as it is, that's why I prefer working on my own than having others work with me. Through the homily, I knew I lack some things-trust and sensitivity.

I was fed up with ineffective plans and disappointments on group works, that's why sometimes, I'd rather do all things, than appoint my co-members . I got this from my father, and I hated it, not knowing that I'm just like him. Since a child, I always work on my own, without having the help of my parents. The thing letting others do something with my grades involved was always a big issue to me. That's why I end up doing all group activities by myself. Whenever I work with people, I was always the one who takes over everything, and that was very wrong of me. People started leaving all things to me, and I had a hard time dealing with them. I created monsters in them. I regretted my actions, and wished I have never taken all things alone.

I am still learning to trust people, and I want to express my deepest regrets for being insensitive to others' feelings. Thank you for having the patience for a kid like me.

* * *

I can't help visiting my blog! but I shall be starting my review for the nth time tomorrow for NCAE, and it's nearing. Wish me luck (again. haha.)

Good luck to those who'll take the exams over the weekends and on Tuesday!
(is it ok if I call you kuya?) Ayel, (pwede din ba? hehe)Quincy, STITCHES!, TEON, Ms. Janice and some members of the faculty at school! Aja! Boscoletz! I miss ya'all!

Are we there yet?

Just went through the 1st quarterly tests, went through all the hurls of meeting deadlines of projects, modules, activities, and the first quarter of seniority isn't as easy as it was in the previous year. We were all wailing about overnight projects, 20-page long reports, after-school activities, and deadlines of the same day for other requirements. And have I mentioned extra-curricular activities and competitions? Man, it's just a quarter of the term and I have three more quarters to go through, how worse would it be at the end of the term? If you are to ask our class the best description for senior high, we would synchronously yell "patayan." But hopefully, things would be much easier in the coming days.
We had just ended the tests and went on again with our practice for our school's aerobic competition, and it was really tiring that I didn't cared much about going home sweaty in my P.E. uniform. And god, we'll have to rise up early tomorrow for the dry run of NCAE on the 29th. And we'll have to bring along with us our P.E. and C.A.T. uniforms. And we'll be having a mock test for NCAE tomorrow. Are they trying to murder or terrorize us by purpose or what? Anyway, I am currently checking my friendster account which I forgot that I actually have an account there-I have not updated it for ages. Through checking it, I knew I was not the only one moaning and suffering from muscular pains and exhaustion through these people's shout outs which happen to appear in the updates.

* * *

I'll be taking the National Career Assessment Exam on the 29th. Through the exam we'll be able to know what career should we pursue, depending on our understanding on these areas: Logical ability, Scientific ability, Language proficiency, Reading comprehension, Entrepreneurial skills and the like. Let's see if I am really destined to take up BS Biology as premed, or if I should consider the courses people have been recommending me.
I might not visit this blog for a while because I'll be preparing AGAIN for another exam whichm this time, is NCAE. I just hope things would be much easier for me, thank God for my Peyups experience! (except for the corner-trip part.haha)
For the mean time, you might want to read my Wika 2007 entry! todo endorsement na ito! read it here:http://tishtashy.blogspot.com/2007/08/nosebleed.html
and you may vote for it if you think it deserves to win. Vote for it at http://pintig.pinoyblogosphere.net/story.php?title=Nosebleed-by-Tricia-Ferrer
By the way, I would like to take this opportunity to express my gratitude for those who voted for my entry, thank you very much. Thanks for the votes, knowing that there are some who appreciates my entry is more than receiving any prizes from the contest. Thanks again!


salamat and see you all soon! BEST OF LUCK TO THOSE WHO'LL TAKE THE EXAMS!

Goodbye Egay, hello school.

Exercise
your right
to vote
as a
blogger
(this is no joke.)

the weather is back to normal. I missed the blue-blanketed sky and high-hanging clouds. What I hate about the weather is the wind, it's too humid, unlike Egay's. Speaking of Egay, have I told you that the recent typhoon and my father shares a common thing? yep. you heard me right. ay mali, you read me right. Egay is the nick of my dad, way back in college. Pop's name is Edgardo. hehe. wala lang, naaliw lang kasi ako may kapangalan na bagyo pop ko. Ako kaya, will I be able to have the same privelage as dad's? pano kaya? hmmm... triciang? tishing? trizzzing? hahaha. ang panget. wag na lang. Well anyway, I'm back in busyness. School's on track again, and great school activities awaits me. I'll have to edit our class's music video, bulletin board competition, poster-making contest, all of those are for our school's Buwan ng Wika program. Egay, if you have free time, you may visit us again, you're always welcome! <-I share this with niknok

* * *

Voting is now officially open for pinoyblogosphere.com's Wika2007 contest. Vote for those who deserve to win! Go and vote! http://pintig.pinoyblogosphere.net/

That's my entry there. May 3 votes na ako. akalain mo yun? haha. Salamat sa mga bumoto at boboto, nagbasa at nagtangka man lang magbasa! salamat! Vote for me if you think I deserve the domain and 5k. haha. Here's a link for my entry. http://tishtashy.blogspot.com/2007/08/nosebleed.html